Don't Call It a Comeback: My Blog Break Is Over.

I'm a little confused that I chose to take a month long blog break when I did considering that a lot of fun/interesting/what-have-you stuff has gone on lately. I started a post but clearly found something more exciting to do. But it's Rocktober, I'm back, and I'm ready to blather. So let's play a little catch-up, shall we? Ready, set, BLOG!

9/19: Our 4 year wedding anniversary! Todd surprised me with flowers and a delicious Pumking. I wrangled a sitter for a few hours so we went out for a nice dinner (steaks and a Caramel Apple Cider martini) and then to a patio for some drinks. It was a good few hours to celebrate a good few years.

9/20: I went to the doc and had a physical because I hadn't slept since Spencer left the hospital. It took forever to zonk out and then I would wake up with HORRIBLE anxiety and that would be that. The whole chemo experience crushed me a little. My physical was fine. Some back issues from previous injuries, low on vitamin D (but who isn't in Cleveland?). I got some at-home physical therapy and a prescription for a kind of "old school" med to help with the insomnia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, and anxiety. I need to take it for 6-12 months to help "calm my brain". 9 months of stress with Spence was too much for as-needed meds like Xanax. After the first dose, I slept well through the night. So far, the med is really working but it makes me never feel full...and I'm trying to lose weight, not gain. Follow-up next week.

9/24: My baby fox turned 1!!! I can't even believe it. He's the happiest, most adventurous baby I've ever met and I'm so glad he's mine. We went to breakfast then the zoo to celebrate and had the whole place to ourselves!! The little dudes had a blast. At home, we opened presents and had cupcakes. I love him so much that I can't really put it into words. His smile lights me up from the inside out. My fire-haired, gap-toothed baby boy!

9/25: At Spencer's clinic appt, I got his pictures from Flashes Of Hope, who take pictures of kids with cancer and their families. Perfection. Such a ham.

9/27: Lisa and Jamie came to visit and we went, along with the boys and a lot of family members, to the K&P art show, which is one of my favorite events. Todd and I scored some awesome pieces and there was food, drinks, and a lot of awesomeness. I was glad to get out and about with Todd. Hospital life was hard on us. Bouncing back takes time.

9/28: Our annual Spec (bacon fry). We merged this with Sully's 1st birthday party and I couldn't have asked for a better day. The weather was 72 and sunny and my sister did an amazing job making things look awesome for the event. We introduced some of our pals to  Spec as well as Boilo, a Lithuanian liquor they referred to as "Noonshine" since it was early for shots...yet no one declined! And I do have to say that on this day, I took the best picture I've ever taken. I'll cherish it as my little Porkchop grows. The first year went too fast.

9/30: Speaking of time going too fast, Spencer started his Early Intervention pre-school. You could tell he had so much fun. The second we walked in the classroom, he was done with us. He had more important things to do and people to meet. It was sad and awesome all at once. This will really be awesome for him. My little boy...not so little anymore.

10/2: Everyone in the household was down with some sort of nasty bug. Sully, Todd, Spencer, then me. Boom! The house was perpetually covered in snot and ick. Every time we thought we were getting better, we relapsed. Been awful, especially for the little dudes. Spencer even missed his second day of school! But we're mending, slowly but surely. At Spencer's clinic visit, his numbers were great despite this cold so they scheduled his biopsy/spinal tap/Echo for the following Thursday. EEK!!

10/5: My niece ended up not going to homecoming so I took her and my nephew's girlfriend to Dave & Buster's. Love it there. Unfortunately, bad as I was, I am now addicted to Guitar Hero and need to get it, STAT. I guess this part of my update wasn't that important but I left the house without kids so it always feels like a mini-vacation.

10/7: Spencer went back to school even though he was still stuffy. He had a great day and looked like such a big boy sitting in his seat, having a snack. But in the middle of the night, he was making these horrible noises and gasping for air. His lips were blue and I thought he was choking. He looked so scared and I felt terrified. In seconds, Todd was out the door to the ER. Turns out Spencer has Croup. Better than choking but still awful. They gave him a breathing treatment and an injection of steroids and they had to wait 2 hours but around 4:00am, they were home...and he slept in our bed. Too scary! Horrible night. And to add insult to injury, his biopsy was cancelled due to his illness. 

10/8: Took my little fox for his 2 year pediatrician appointment. He was 23 pounds (10th percentile) and 31.5" (95th percentile). Long and lean. She isn't worried about his crazy bow legs and his iron is perfect. He's right on track and awesome, but I've always known that. We're weaning him off his bottles and enjoying watching our Adventure Baby grow. We celebrated his awesomeness at The Boneyard.

10/10: I've been feeling a little down about not having a job and not being in school this semester, like I'm not contributing. So I've been trying to make the best of my time. Keeping the house in check, lots of organizing, weeding out, and cooking. Streamlining our lives. And spending a lot of time with my boys because I may not have time with them like this again. Today we listened to a lot of music and made Apple and peach crisps from scratch, roasted and smashed apples and various squash, and made pot roast with garden vegetables. It was a great day...and hilarious since Sully is in a stage where he constantly ditches his diaper. I'm a lucky mom.

10/12: Kid-free date night! Mike and Lori got married and we had a night out on the town for wedding 3 of 5. We got dressed up, ate good food, drank some drinks, took advantage of the photobooth, had a dance, and caught up with pals. It was a blast and I wish the newlyweds a lifetime of happiness. Footnote: the bride's dress caught on fire so they'll always have that story.

10/13: The Light The Night Walk to benefit the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Team Spencer raised almost $4,000 and 30 of my family members and friends (but let's be honest, my friends are family, too) walked. We were team #11 out of 92 Friends & Family teams as far as fundraising goes. So rad! At one point, there was a Survivors Parade (survivors had white balloons) and we carried Spencer down the row. I held the tears in but they were there. He's a survivor. And we'll know that for certain after his biopsy this Wednesday. It was really a great time and seeing all the red balloons (which symbolized walking in support of someone else) was so cool. 4,500 people were there and I heard we were on the news!

And that brings us to today. You're all caught up. I'm exhausted. So I'll leave you with Spencer's 1st school art project! Happy Rocktober. Now be sure to study all of this in case there's a pop quiz.

Done: This Is The Dawning Of The Rest Of Our Lives

I'm blogging from my bed! And it's not the weekend! I'm blogging from my bed and Spencer is next to me! It's OVER! Hospital life has called it quits and much earlier than we expected might I add! I never have to pack a hospital bag again!!! I threw away my slippers!  So how did we go from having weeks to be there to coming home?? It's a weird but good story...with a fantastic ending. Never a dull moment for us! Get comfy!

Friday (the 6th) will go down as just one of the weirdest days ever. While sitting there chatting with a nurse, I couldn't help staring at Spencer. I thought it was the way he was sitting that made him look like he had no neck. But then it looked as if his head was sitting directly on his chest. Because it was! Where was his neck?!? His chest and shoulder were so swollen, I've never seen anything like it. He looked like Baby Hulk and the swelling seemed to be spreading across to the other shoulder. When I touched him, there was a weird squish tonhis upper body. The pictures I have do ZERO justice. 

Little things, clues if you will, started to come together...he had been in some unexplainable pain for 2 days and not sleeping well, they couldn't draw blood from his line, he hadn't been putting out many wet diapers, and he went from 10.2 to 11.3 kilos while barely eating. It could've been a clot or an infection but an X-Ray showed something I dreaded: his line had pulled out of his superior vena cava and was coiled up in his shoulder, pumping fluids into his tissue. I was reassured that he received all his chemo medication as it was definitely in place at the time. And no clot or infection was a really good thing. They also suspected that the fluid would be absorbed within 24 hours.

A decision had to be made about a new line. Yes, chemo was over but he still needed daily labs, meds, and possible fluids and transfusions. Yes, a regular IV COULD be used but they don't last long. If he didn't have a line anymore, there really wasn't a reason why he couldn't go home because the threat of infection would be gone. But the docs were leaning toward removing the Broviac and trying to place a new PICC. The PICC team, who couldn't place one last time due to scarring in his veins, said they would try ONCE in the morning. If it wouldn't go in, he was out of luck.

But in the morning, I woke up to 2 of his docs in our room, and they asked me what I wanted. Of COURSE I didn't want him to have a new line! Not just because I selfishly wanted him to go home. This would be his 6th LINE! And putting him through that for a few weeks of recovery and MAYBE needing it just seemed cruel, especially when it could set him up for another line infection. The 2 docs felt the same but it was up to the big dogs.

And they agreed as well, shockingly!! The new plan was to sedate him, pull the Broviac, and not place a new line. My aunts and I went  with him and stayed in the room during the procedure (add that to the procedures I've seem). As quickly as he fell asleep, the damn thing was out and we were headed back to his room. He was a MUCH happier (and less swollen) guy when it was done. And I was much happier because the main doc said she wanted him to stay overnight just to make sure his labs were OK but that after platelets, he could go home...for GOOD!! I didn't want to get my hopes up that things eould stsy gold overnight. We never had much luck.

But I guess it was our lucky day after all. His labs looked great so he just needed platelets and he could go. I weeded through all of our things, throwing out my toothbrush and slippers, leaving toys and even his play mat behind (once we got home, I even had to get rid of most of his hospital pajamas). There were too many memories attached to everything. So as I packed, we waited on platelets which turned out to be a bust! They started them and then noticed his IV was leaking...told you they didn't last long. Rather than start a new IV, they had us put his handprint on the wall of kids that finished chemo, his doc sang Leaving On A Jet Plane, and he drove home, FOR GOOD.

We rolled up to balloons, a banner, a cake, and flowers. My parents and sister's family all came to welcome him home but he was most excited to his his brother! They had a sweet moment after being reunited. I had some tears in the driveway before I even walked in the door. After his visitors left, we got Chinese food, locked the door, and let it all sink in. After 7 months of treatment and 100 total days in the hospital, Spencer was home.

We pretty much stayed barricaded in the house for the weekend besides a trip to Costco and a stop to see my parents on Grandparent's Day. We ate, watched football, hung out, and just tried to BE, which I'm having a little trouble with. I can't sit still. Can't stop. Can't sleep. I guess the plus side of that is I'm getting a lot of projects done. But I'm exhausted and feeling just a tad bit nutty. I'll deal with that another time. When I implode probably. Monday, we picked up Aiden and all went to Fathead's for the celebratory meal I was waiting for. Spencer finally got his chips...and I got a Trooper.

I'm fingers are tired of typing so I'll wrap up. Monday he had a follow up...no transfusions. Yesterday he had a follow up...no transfusions! While his ANC is low, his platelets are going up so everything else should follow. When he has recovered, he'll have his biopsy and then we'll know if he is cancer free!! When he is (WHEN, not IF), his follow ups will go to once a month for awhile. For now, we go back next Wednesday to see how he's progressing.

This weekend, we have tons of fun planned. Friday is the World Apple Pie Eating Championships at Mapleside and we will be there! Joey Chestnut will, too! Saturday we'll be at German Central for their Oktoberfest and Sunday we're watching the Browns game with pals. Please feel free to join us on any of our weekend adventures as we get back to real life!!!!

Updates next week! Thanks for the continues support. We still need it!