Thursday, February 23, 2012

Blah: Too Exhausted To Come Up With a Clever Title

So let's get you all caught up, shall we?

1. Monday night, a Home Health Care nurse came to restart my IV. That was a disaster. Both hands were out of commission from bing past sites or having blown veins. She attempted to get one in my wrist and failed. Tried to get one in my forearm and that was turning out to be terrifying for both of us. Finally, she said she had no choice but to put it in the bend of dominant arm. NOT conveinient with a 6 month old. Very uncomfortable all around and when I would bend my arm, say to feed my child, the IV would stop dripping. What the HELL..

My veins were so difficult to find (which is not usually the case) that they sent out 9 MORE LITERS of fluids to plump me back up. I was so close to done. So close. The nurse tried to find the heartbeat but warned me it might not happen. It would have been cool since both of my parents were here (I needed a babysitter again) but no dice. Sigh. Would've been nice.

2. Spencer had his Oncology clinic yesterday and of course, because I'm all jacked up, I couldn't take him. This BROKE MY HEART. I haven't missed one appointment. That's been MY thing. I like to give all the information and get all the information and here them rave about how great he's doing and how good he looks (he dresses up for his nurse girlfriends). But it wasn't going to happen. I'm crummy mom again. It would've been dangerous with how I was feeling. So my sister stepped in and took him and I cried as soon as they walked out the door.

The good news is that he's doing great, per usual. He's 14.7 pounds and 26.5 inches long. Like the pediatrician, they said he's very strong and they really don't have many concerns regarding the Leukemia. They drew his blood (got it on the second attempt) and I got the results last night. Everything is A-OK! Even his infection-fighting white blood cells which had been boarder line low in the past. His doc said 1 or 2 more monthly visits and we can start to space them out. That will make me SO HAPPY. Watching him give blood...destroys.

3. After a very angry evening, my little man was being sweet as can be this morning. Lots of cuddling, hugging, playing. But after a very brief nap, my little maniac decided that the tube I kept telling him he couldn't pull was too tempting. He gave it a niiiiiiiiiiice good pull...and out came my IV. I didn't even really notice at first until my arm felt super cold. It was cold and wet because IV fluid was pouring down it. DRAT!

I called my Home Health Care nurse and we decided the IV will stay out. I've got nowhere else for it to go right now. My veins are beat and I'm all bruised up. So as long as my ketones stays negative-to-trace, I can stay off the IV fluids. If anything changes, back in it goes. This would be awesome except that I feel REALLY crummy today and have thrown up twice...I thought I was on the mend there. I'm starting to think it's sugary things that are wrecking me but I was told to try and pack on calories. I'll have to try another route. Like Mr. Hero, mmmmmm. Straight grease. That'll be tasty when it comes back up.

Hopefully this weekend will be less eventful. I'm planning sleep, sleep, and more sleep (along with a rotation of eating and drinking) so I can go back to work on Monday. I'm not really looking forward to anyone's smart ass comments or questions, especially about the Zofran pump I have to carry across my shoulder. But I'm letting people down by not being there. I need to get stronger so it's not 8 hours of torture. Please send some good vibes my way. I need them.


  1. You are NOT a crummy mom.And certainly not a crummy mom 'again.' You are doing what you need to do for baby number 2 that is growing along inside you. Spencer is being well taken care of, even if you dont think its true. And I miss you. That is all.

  2. I am horrified to hear about all that you're going through. You are an AMAZING mom to BOTH of your babes. Definitely sending good vibes your way ... lots of "hang in there" and "you can do it" inspirational thoughts. Mostly sending an email hug. Phoebe's Mum.