Monday, May 21, 2012

Here's Something Clever: I Need a Weekend From My Weekend

Another weekend comes to a close and once again, my body is telling me that I didn't HAVE a weekend. I'm in such a panic over how much we have to get done before Spencer's birthday party (11 weeks) and Sullivan's arrival (18 weeks), that I think I'm pushing myself too hard, especially on Sundays.

Sundays seems to be the day we accomplish the most. Todd opened the pool and did some hardcore work in the back and front yards. I emptied out the art room and it's officially ready for paint, carpet, and Aiden's big move. Spencer helped keep me company while I tore apart a room I really loved (but reminding myself that the end result is having a new room for the new baby we'll be bringing home makes it SO WORTH IT). It helped.

But before we had one of our Any (and every) Given Sunday moments, I had some sweet times with my fella after shaking my stomach-wrecking sickness. Saturday, in sort of a spur of the moment fashion, I packed a bag and Spencer and I headed to Geneva-On-The-Lake for some firsts. First off, it was his longest car ride: an hour and 15 minutes. He snoozed the entire way until I pulled into the parking lot.

He also saw his first basketball niece and nephew are on a Lithuanian league and this is where the tournament was held this year. He was fascinated by the squeaking of the shoes, the whistles, and all the kids running amok. He barely made a peep through 4 games and even took a nice, if not sweaty, nap.

Next on his checklist of "firsts" was going to the beach! The second I set him down on his blanket, he took a handful of sand and dropped it right in his face. Luckily, his eyes were closed (he's anti-sun, like mommy) and his quick 10 minute experience (the beach at Geneva was just a little too rock-filled to get him close to the water) was nothing short of fascinating. I think he just might be getting a sandbox for his birthday!

I wish Todd could've been there but he was dead set on getting some work done at Castle Grayskull. I couldn't complain. Anything that he does helps alleviate my stress, so I'm thankful for that, especially since it's starting to get difficult for me to do certain things. There will be a whole summer of beach memories after the work is done.

And here's a pregnancy memory for you: I've moved up to the next pant size! My preggo belly wasn't comfy anymore in my day-to-day jeans and I had a brand new pair of the next size up stashed in my closet (I thought I'd be bigger post-Spencer than I was) so here I am. In comfy pants but not in maternity pants, just how I like it. I also like that my belly button remains where it belongs and that I have no stretch marks or the creepy black belly line. Superficial, I know.

Sullivan is at the stage in development where he might taste whatever I'm eating. I hope he likes grape juice and chocolate covered peanuts because I can't get enough! He's been wiggling up a storm which makes me feel soooo good. The more he wiggles, the more I know he's OK in there. Somewhere buried deep in the back of my mind is the thought that something could STILL go wrong, no matter how many times we're told that he looks perfect and no matter that the test results say. I could make it all the way to September 24th and not bring a baby home. Heartbreaking.

And something about that thought had me, for a very, very brief moment, rethinking the tubal I have scheduled. They say not to do it if you're not 100% and I'm about...98% today. We wanted to have 2 children together. Each of the boys has their own room and we're not hurting for space by any means. We can afford the children we have. No one is going to be shorted anything they need, including love and attention. It all makes sense. But I'm questioning. I don't want to shut the factory down and have any regrets. Maybe it would be different if I started having kids in my 20s.

But really, I have no regrets about that. I did all the things I wanted to do...and I'm continuing to do all the things I want to do! Except that right at this very moment, I'd rather be playing with this evil, little monster!

And SPEAKING of monsters, was it just me or did Lady Gaga's voice sound really OFF on the Simpson's last night? I've heard her speaking voice live, twice, and MANY times on television and I don't recall it sounding quite like that. I love how she allowed them to poke major fun at her, but her voice...I just don't know.

And in other celebrity blather...farewell, Robin Gibb. You were a fine Bee Gee, indeed.


  1. As you know, a closed-down factory is something I have recently become rather familiar with. Slightly different, as it wasn't by choice, necessarily, but I never really planned to USE my factory. As you also know. Until suddenly I couldn't anymore.
    Of course there were feelings of sadness and regret and all of that. Apparently this is a TOTALLY STANDARD reaction.
    You have an amazing family. It will be amazing no matter how many little boys you have. (I say "little boys" and not "kids" because you are clearly a penis factory.)
    Keep thinking about it. You have time to prepare, to change your mind if you decide it is not the absolute right choice yet, or to get to 100% certainty that you are ready to close up the factory. You have time. You will know what's right when the time comes.
    Don't worry, lady!

  2. I think if we had more money I would want a 3rd baby. Right now, we have just enough money and the perfect amount of space. But something keeps tugging at me. I go back and forth. Because when I think about all the testing we had to have this time to ease our minds, and how sick I was in the beginning...could I really do this again?? I don't think it's helping that I have so much going on right now. My brain is beat up.